The Assholes My Friends Meet On-Line

Posted on: June 2, 2012

The title pretty much sums it all up.  Let’s recap what’s happened just this week:

1) My friend, A, who was on “plenty of fish” summed up her experience as this (after reading about Z and Dr. Dallas):

i guess things are as bad in the indian-arranged marriage world as they are on the dating web site world…i joined plenty of fish to see what was out there…a bunch of pervs…people suck!!!

2) My friend, P, who got both of these gems through (Shaadi =marriage, it’s the indian dating site):

a) This guy told her he was born/raised in Australia. We call bullshit. He didn’t ever properly respond to her emails, just wrote a bunch of stuff that never answered what she asked. These are just excerpts, but you can imagine what the rest of it sounded like:

Hi, hope you are having a wonderful weekend. am fascinated that you replied and actually say somethings about yourself. I have gone through your profile all over again and I think my heart click yes to you . I am looking for friendship initially as I am not here to talk to you about general things such as partying, the weather, sports, e.c.t. I want to learn about you and what makes up your heart and soul, as the friendship I want to build with you I want it to be like no other you have ever shared in or experienced. This friendship I want to build with you will be filled with substance, quality, spirituality and potential.- hopefully leading to something in the future.

My family are wonderful people and small and peaceful..

I have always felt like I was the most happiest man alone because i have a great life and a great job but thats not true because I have realized that some part of me needs to be shared so I have to let myself free to this unique feeling .what I admire in a woman is a caring,trustworthy,faithfulness,down to earth,intelligence,also romantic.and my dislike in a lady is unfaithfulness and selfishness and liar.

Um…. what the fuck. There is no way he went to school in an English speaking country. So, he starts this whole thing with a lie?! WHY? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????  Also, apparently his family is The Littles.

b) The other guy that she liked on Shaadi – she thought he was cute, emailed him, hadn’t heard. She finally hears from him… and what does he say??

Hi, I really liked your profile. You look pretty and seem like a cool girl. But, I like girls to email me twice before I email them back, and since you only emailed me once, I’m declining your interest.

Just What. The. Fuck. WTF. I looked him up. He’s not that cute, he’s not that special, and he’s clearly an asshole. As hurt as she was, at least she knew up front that he’s a narcissistic douche instead of finding out a year later.

3) My friend, T, who’s on got this from some Indian guy. This was his opener – we don’t even know what it means – is he bisexual? A crossdresser? She asked if it was a joke, and all he responded was “No”:


So yeah… this is what we’re dealing with. Every time someone in my family asks, “Why don’t you try online?” like I’m a fucking idiot who’s never done it before, I think I’m just going to forward them this…

Sigh. Here’s hoping “our hearts click yes” at some point in the near future! 😉


5 Responses to "The Assholes My Friends Meet On-Line"

this was a really funny post, although its really sad such creeps lurk all over. but its better to know about them before the heart click yes

Absolutely better to know up front!!! Sigh…”heart clicks yes”… we use this for EVERYTHING now! Even the wine last night — our ‘hearts clicked yes’ to a few bottles 😉

sure we do and my heart clicks yes to your blog. i was reading your older blog posts. good writing 😀

awww! Thanks!!!!! 🙂 You are too sweet and I’m so excited your heart clicks yes to my writing!!! 🙂

Online dating is a chamber of horrors. Trust me.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 280 other followers


%d bloggers like this: