Why do I attract crazy?

Posted on: February 7, 2013

It’s a legit question. There’s a neon sign flashing above me that only weirdos can see and I have to figure out a way to change what it says.

Last night, I was out with the boys. Dinner with drinks, bar with drinks, second bar with drinks, strip club with drinks, second strip club with drinks.  I should be passed out in a ditch somewhere with how many I had….

In any case, it was my friend, R, and his friends and coworkers. There was one guy, B, who seemed nice but not super flirty with me. Cute, funny – I enjoyed chatting with him and overheard him mention, in another conversation with someone else, that he’s married. He didn’t tell me directly, nor does he wear a ring.

By the second strip club, we were all feeling gooooooooooood. And he and I were feelin’ each other. We kissed.

We go back to my friend’s place, it’s 4am by this point and we drink some more. I drunkenly DEMANDED we play “True Americans” – but nobody would listen to me or look up the rules. Super bummed!!!

There’s 4 boys, plus me, all crashing at my friend’s place – so me and B, of course, take the guest room and get busy.

We’re making out, clothes are coming off, and his hands are down my pants when he finally decides to say, “You know, I love my wife.”


I’m annoyed now, so I tell him we’re not having sex. Him: “Why not?”

Me: “Because I don’t know where you’ve been and I don’t trust you. I hope you use protection so you don’t take anything back to your wife.”

I do take care of him though, clean up and come back out and he’s half asleep. Oh… hell no. I tell him to wake up and finish me off. There was NO WAY he was gonna get out of that.

He did, and we’re just chatting and because I’m a needy bitch at times, I ask him: “When’d you know you wanted to sleep with me?” (Yes, I love knowing WHEN boys decide things. I can’t help it.)

Him: “I can’t answer that.”

Me: “Why?”

Him: “Because I’m married.”


This asshole. Now, comes his guilt and near tears. Seriously, I’m SO ANNOYED.

So he says, “You know, I don’t know why I’m telling you this but I just really need to feel validated by women. I need to know that they want me. My mom passed when I was little and it really fucked me up, so now…”


Luckily, he did not see me roll my eyes. He did hear me say, “Well, stop cheating on your wife. That’ll help you feel better.”  He then goes on to tell me that even though I’m such an awesome girl, he LOVES his wife and wants to be with her and this only happened because of the alcohol.

Uh, thanks, DICK. It’s not like I thought he was going to leave her for me, but glad we clarified it.  SO THEN, because he will not just shut the fuck up and go to sleep, he says, “Please don’t tell R.”

Now, R is my friend. R is also B’s friend. R is also B’s manager at work. So B is totally freaked the fuck out that R is going to realize he cheated on his wife and that will reflect poorly on him at work and screw up his career.

First of all, what did B think everyone else thought when we WENT TO THE SAME BEDROOM?!?!?! AND WHEN WE KISSED AT THE BAR?!!?

But secondly, his fear of R figuring out what we did and “punishing” him at work was what was driving his “guilt” – I do believe he loves his wife, but I am 100% convinced he was MORE worried about his career. If I wasn’t R’s friend, I don’t think I would’ve gotten half the “I feel so guilty” bullshit.

I didn’t pursue him and I didn’t start anything, and would’ve slept on the couch just happily – HE kissed me, HE led me to the room, HE made the first move and I was in the mood for a fun night with a cute boy. It’s not my responsibility to keep him faithful – that’s on him. And, I already knew this isn’t the first time he cheated. And he’s been married only 6 months. And he’s only 26.

Jesus fucking Christ. His poor wife is in for what my friend went through (the one who got cheated on by her husband) – he’s not going to stop. My friend and I actually talked about it today, because while I didn’t feel guilty in the context of him and his wife, I felt SUPER guilty thinking about how devastated she was when she found out. She was the first person I texted this morning to tell, and she and I both agree that he’s a total narcissist. He totally gets off on being wanted by women and then goes on to put on this “I feel so guilty act,” which I think was supposed to then make me feel bad for him and his conflict and in turn tell him he’s not a bad person.

Wrong girl for that. He told me at some point during the night that he couldn’t ‘do this’ anymore and I was going to be the last one ever. I don’t know if I’m flattered or offended, really. I don’t believe him either way.

I got dropped off at my place this morning at 7am after sleeping for an hour. Slept for another hour in my own bed and then went to work. I am too old for this shit.





8 Responses to "Why do I attract crazy?"

This guy is crazy. lol.

I know! I should’ve known better but still… I didn’t expect THAT much drama!

Lol!! Is it daftly practical of me to think at least the last waxing session is being made use off!!?

I hadn’t even got waxed yet!!! STILL HAVEN’T! LOL!!! It really does not matter, I guess 🙂

I attract crazy too! Bloody men..! Are there any normal/faithful ones left in the world??! :-/

No. Nowhere – not any continent. NONE. 😉

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