Posts Tagged ‘i’m gonna punch you in the stomach

Let’s just go ahead and answer that: Yes. Maybe. Depends on the definition of ‘bitch.’

To back up, I went to a “Stir” event tonight with a friend. We were having fun, chatting mostly with ourselves and the random guy here and there, but nothing exciting.

Then we met these two guys, “S” – he was the one who was actually on Match, and his friend, “T” – who S had dragged along. So S was chatting with us, and he was cute – seemed smart, had a job, is around our age, so we stayed chatting with him. About 2 minutes in, he asked my friend: “So, what do you do for fun? And don’t say travel, everyone says travel but nobody really does it.”

Little does he know who he’s chatting with – she travels extensively for her work, and so do I. Actually, I will pretty much bet that in that group of people at the event, I’ve traveled the furthest and the most exotic-est. Yet, I’m not bragging about it, so why does he think he needs to start with being hostile about it? And he didn’t say it in a cute-funny-flirty way. He said it in a completely dick-ish way, like nobody but him ever does anything with their lives. And pretty much insinuating that if we even dared to say we enjoy travel, we were lying. And then he went on to tell my friend that she reminded him of a girl from high school. That he didn’t like.

OK. Seriously, who does that? Why do that? Why be a dick to just be a dick? And I guess something to know about me – You can talk shit to my face, about me, all day long. I will not give a fuck. But if you ever say anything about my friends, I will make it known exactly how I feel about you – and not in a nice way. I am fiercely loyal and protective of friends and family. Always have been, always will be.

Anyway, he continued to be not so nice to us, so we departed from chatting with him. A little bit later, on the other side of the room, T came over to talk to us, and we enjoyed our conversation with just him – he was nice, friendly, and just fun to talk to.  We were about to leave the event and go to dinner, so we let T know that they were welcome to come if they’d like. They came. Big mistake.

We’re all chatting at dinner and in about 10 minutes, after he’d already been weirdly unsocial and rude, S made a “joke” about women being bad drivers who shouldn’t be on the roads (apparently we got teleported to 1922), talked about how women just like to shop and then called us ITP snobs. And then insulted my friend, again. I was definitely intoxicated when this happened, so I didn’t take too kindly to him being an asshole and this was the ensuing conversation:

Me: “So… do you get a lot of second dates off the girls you meet on Match? Because you’re kind of a dick. I assume they’ll stop at one.”

Him (after being a little speechless for a bit): “Yeah. I do fine. Actually, I get a lot of second dates.”

Me: “Oh, that’s good. And surprising. Cause really, you’re an asshole. I’m not sure how that happens.”

Him: “Well, I guess I’m just an ass when I know it’s not ever going anywhere and I feel like I should be honest, because I have nothing to lose.”

Me: …. just laughter. Really, I couldn’t do anything but laugh at the inanity of that comment. So it’s ok to be rude, mean, and downright vicious because you don’t think you’ll get something out of the person you’re talking to? That’s an awesomely shitty philosphy to live life.

And honestly, I don’t even think that’s true. I think he’s just a little boy, who could dish it out, but when encountered by women who don’t rely on men for every little thing, and were able to talk back and retaliate to the stupid comments, HE couldn’t take it.

And yes, I know I should’ve dropped it. But he was such a fucking prick all night, I couldn’t help but call it as I see it. What woman would want to date him after he’s insulting, rude and condescending? He was all of those things, in an event where you would expect people’s best behavior. So this was his best showing? What’s left to enjoy in the future? Barbs about how women should be barefoot and pregnant? Discussions about how rape wouldn’t happen if women didn’t wear such revealing clothes?

I had invited T (his friend) to a party we’re having, and I’d told S he could come as well. After that last conversation, S said, “OH, by the way, I think I’ll be busy on that night, so I can’t come.”

Me: “Oh. Such a shame. Our loss.”

Seriously, asshole. Don’t fuck with me. And definitely don’t fuck with my friends. I have no patience for it. What makes me so annoyed (with myself) was I thought he the cute one! My friend picked up on the douche-ness before I did, which of course now has me questioning my abilities to choose good ones. Poor T was caught in the middle, and he was definitely feeling awkward.

The boys left before we did, and when the waitress came over, she said: “Oh, they left?” We replied that they had to get home, and she goes, “The one [T] was nice, but the other one was really odd. He was just weird. There’s something wrong with him.”


So… Sure. I may be a bitch, but only when it’s really deserved (in my opinion). The ironic part of the whole night was that my girlfriend said that I was nicer than anyone she’d ever met – I would talk to anyone who approached us, whether I was interested or not. Whether I found them cute or not. Whether I would date them or not. I just think that’s the nice appropriate thing to do. People go to events like this (or even just to the bar, or out in general) to meet others, and I’m not going to ever be rude for no reason. I will talk to anyone who talks to me, and I’ll treat them with respect and kindness and sincerity. Apparently, not everyone thinks like that.

AND… T clearly liked me, because he texted and said it was a pleasure to meet me, and he hopes we meet up soon. I guess I’ll have to forgive his bad taste in friends.

So there… Bitch? Yes. Deservedly bitchy? More than yes.






Posted on: June 11, 2012

Went home to my parents’ place in Florida this weekend – my sister and I met up at the Atlanta airport and surprised our parents with a visit (my brother couldn’t come, which was a shame). All through our layover and on the flight, my sister’s kids (6 year old girl, 3 year old boy) were so excited and would not stop talking about HOW they were going to surprise them: “I’m going to jump up and down and say boo! No, I mean peek-a-boo!!!!” … “I’m going to yell SUP-WHISE!!!!!” … “I’m going to yell THIS LOUD!” … um yeah, none of that happened.

We got there, rang the bell, and DEAD SILENCE. Neither said ANYTHING! In any case, Dad came out first and was fine – recognized us all and gave the kids the biggest hug. Mom, on the other hand, came out, was confused (since they weren’t expecting us) and then almost fainted.  Like seriously started to weeble-wobble in the door way, held herself up with the frame of the door and then started to cry. I really thought we were going to have to call an ambulance. SO… that was the first and last surprise visit they’ll ever get!

The kids are awesome and put everyone in a good mood. We didn’t even talk about me not being married! I didn’t even get yelled at! We went to the beach and the pool and played all day long. I now know why people say that it’s best to have kids when you’re young. They’re a lot of work — it’s freaking exhausting! We ended up at the beach during high tide, so there were a lot of waves – the kids can’t really swim in the ocean (pool’s fine) so just imagine fighting breaking waves with an extra 3o lbs hanging off you. It’s soooo tiring.

The 6-year old gets up around 8am and stays up till 10pm. AND TALKS ALL DAY LONG.  I love it 🙂  She’s my mini-me and we have so much fun together. She’s also not as moody as when she was little which is nice. She’s also super cute and really smart. It’s fun to chat with her about everything (apparently, she asked my sister one day if her little brother’s pee-pee was going to fall off when he got older.  ha ha ha ha ha. We could not stop giggling about that for a long time).

The 3-year old is a naughty, funny little boy. For the first full day, he’d walk around saying, “I’m gonna punch you in the stomach!” and I could not figure out why. Turns out it’s from some song they learned in school, so we sang it all weekend – ‘My name is Choo Choo Charlie, I know karate, gonna punch you in the stomach, oops i’m sorry. Gotta go potty, call my mommy. My name is… freeze.”  W.T.F.

Anyway, I told the kids I was going to tell the people I work with that I was going to punch them in the stomach. And my little one looks at me and he says “If you do that, then you’ll proll-a-ly have to go to jail. They’ll call the po-leese.”  Yup – that is all true. I told him he was right and he’d have to visit me in jail.

Being a three year old boy, farts are the funniest thing in the world. So are poop jokes. We all have a LOT of fun being gross together.

So I came back to my place – all alone – and I miss them and my sister and my mom and dad and wish I was still there. Especially since come tomorrow morning I have to go to work and I’ll feel like punching people.

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